I don”t know why science is so difficult for women but it just is.

Take your average girl and average guy and sit them side-by-side and before long you”ll start to realize that they”re a bit different. Its not the hair, or the way one has nice curves and the other likely has hair growing out of his nose, — its the way they react to the world around them.

You can easily prove this by sitting a bunny in front of them.

The girl will sigh and say “AWWWWWWWW”.The boy will see dinner.

Its just the way we are.

Still,knowing these differences doesn”t help me explain why there is such a gulf when it comes to how we view the mechanical foundations of the Universe. I learned this after rewatching the original Planet of the Apes series recently. It sparked a simple question which I asked my wife.

The premise was very straightforward.

If a man’s wife dies and afterwards, he sleeps with another women, has he committed adultry?

She first said no.

Then, I expanded it to explain that if I were propelled more than 3000 years into the future and found a hot cave-chick like Linda Harrison, I’d jump her bones, happily knowing that when I found a way back to my own time, my wife wouldn’t harbor any complaints.

She said that if I did such a thing, I’d be in big, big trouble!

Needless to say I was confused. If having your wife dead for a year or so meant that you were legally and morally free to get it on with another woman then certainly, having her wither in her grave for over 3000 years gave you more than enough breathing room. If you managed to return to your spouse later on, that would just be a bonus, right?

So I thought to illustrate it all another way. Say, (I said), you went back in time to the 1800s. There you hooked up with a hot western chick and did the dirty in the back of the saloon. By my thinking, you would still be in good standing because you wouldn’t have even met your wife in the 1800s. That relationship was still far in the future. That’s OK, right?

She gave me one of those looks that concurrently says I’m an idiot and I have antlers growing out of my head.

As it turns out, we don’t agree on vampires either.

If you’ve ever seen any vampire movie you know that at the end, the girl is swooned by the vampire.  After she’s been bitten a few times, she runs off with him and almost joins the legions of the undead so she can be with him for the next 800 years, but then is “freed” when the guy drives a stake through the vampire’s chest.

The guy then hugs the woman and is overjoyed to have her back.

Seriously, — what man is that stupid?

Did these screenwriters ever think to talk to a guy who would really be brave enough to face a vampire?  If they did, the first thing they’d learn is that no dude is going to take back a half-undead woman after he’s been kicked to the curb for some rotting Transylvanian hunk.

My wife thinks I lack forgiveness.

I remind her of her lack of compassion regarding my planned efforts to go through great lengths to return 3000 years from the future only to have her give me the cold shoulder for things that happened long after she was dead.

She reminded me that sometimes I can be a real pain in the ass.

I recognize this is just her emotional reaction to being confronted with hard science.

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